shoot first, then ask questions.

Is it so hard to ask a question? Can we just, for five minutes, take a step back and allow others to make their own choices? Or have a discussion rather than screaming at one another to get a point across? Apparently not. Thank you, for apologizing, but seriously, I'm an adult. If I did something questionable while I was away, that is "for [my] eyes only." For me, that's top secret. What information I choose to disclose is my own choice. I don't have to tell you anything. I don't have to be something you think I should be. I don't have to do EVERY damn thing you tell me to do. I'm an adult. Stop treating me like a child, like I'm 16 again. If I choose to lie to you about where I'm going, take it for what it is, and let it go. I will get defensive and I will blurt out exactly how I'm feeling in that moment. I'll get brash, crass, belligerent, angry, and red all in the same moment. What business is it of yours? I've done alright so far, I may not be type of person you brag to all your friends about, but I'm doing OK.

So, don't, OK? Just don't. Treat me like that, I don't want to tell you anything. Treat me like that, and I'll walk away because I don't have to take it. I don't have to let you treat me like I'm never going to get anywhere or like I'm never going to become a better person. Fine. You want to see hellion, I'll give you a little hellion. If you don't believe that I'm going to do better, why the fuck should I? True, not the way I should look at it, but sometimes, support is the only thing you can ask for and when you don't get even a smidgen of it, well, sometimes wanting the your world to crash is the only thing you can think about.

So, before you get upset about me not wanting to join in on the "fun", ask me about my activities. Don't just assume I'd lie. Don't assume I won't tell you anything. I'M NOT SIXTEEN! But since you've already made the comment, forget it. I don't want to tell you a damn thing. Leaving you wondering is my way of taking control. Do or don't like it, cause I don't give a rats ass.